I was able to capture the grief of my late 30s on canvas. I used real make up to ‘paint my face’. The green, was glow in the dark. I worked in cosmetics at Nordstrom then, and my dad was dying.
I re-imagined myself in my mid forties, resurrecting the original. No one could bear to look at it anyway. I remember thinking when it was finished, I looked way cheerier now. I was probably still drinking then. Or newly sober. That was the last time I wore my hair darker than it was naturally.
I think I will do another soon. Before my mid 50s run out. Although…maybe I should wait until I am HaPpier. I am going through another knot-hole right now.
That’s what makes these “selfies” so CrEEPpy, the damn timing…